It`s more then a week from my last travel, and I still didn`t start to write the blog I promissed. Well now I did. The plan was to do a seahorse shaped circuit around Europe with some stops somewherre. Very precise description, right?
The standard I was used to till this point was to stand in the middle of some random square, saying hi to the microphone, and apologizing to any possible victims of my music making. But not this time.
This time I managed to bring a friend, which actually can sing, a friend named Laco. Our common interests were rock music, talking with drunk girls and asking people for cigarettes while being drunk.
My car was in terrible state, but my father had an accident on motorbike and had to stay in hospital for some time, so he decided to borrow me his. (Without any unneccesarry violence)
Car was not only method of transport, but also method of sleep, and other things. From the beginning, things went quite well, till we reached D1, probably worst fucking road in central europe, build of concret blocks somewherre during times of Adolf Hitler, famous for never ending traffic jams.
First stop on the list, Prague… We managed to play a few gigs accoustically in Vaclavske Namesti till we met Katya, a girl from Russia, which hanged out with us till the late evening. She was on her trip through europe.
Next day in Naplavka, where 2 guys joined us, first we met Chloch, randomly in the street, while waiting for Cheeko also from Czech republic. Guys did both great job, we even met some drunk German tourists, which all joined us and sang a few songs with us, while one of them, dressed as a little girl was going with the hat and collecting money.
Clearly nice times, but our goals were clear, google maps told us, we have to drive more than 8000 kilometres in 3 weeks, anyway…
Next stop was in Hrimezdice, abandoned mine near Prague, which you can remember from the previous stories. We did a jump to the water in here, and also an reduction diet for the things we brought in the car with us, which was too fucking much, and therefore we left some in this beautiful place as thrash. (In an ecofriendly way of course, don`t worry for our souls for we will go to hell for different reasons)
Visits to this place are always fun and legendary… this time we went to party in the village and we meta guy we call Babeta, what is an old comunist sooter/motorbike.
Babeta was a 45+- years old man dragging his scooter at aproximately 2am, in drunk state, but still had enough focus and willpower to bring us to a local football team party. On our way he also took 3 plastic bottles filled looking like they are filled with petrol, which were actually filled with beer. He was very hospitable with the beer he had, that`s why he is one of maine heroes of our stories. People who buy us beer on the way always become heroes. (If you want us to make a song about you, you know what you have to do). Well some people at the party were suspicious as it was a village football team, where everybody knows everybody, but most of the people were friendly and the party was also a lot of fun sometimes.
Next stop, Cesky Krumlov, last town in Czech Republic so far. Once some Asian director made a fairytale in this city, and from that moment, this place is full of Asian tourists and therefore makes a lot of money on selling selfie sticks.
We spent one evening and one full day here, made enough money to get all the way to Bregenz at the lake Konstanz. Here we played in a random place by the lake, which was quite calm, but sometimes some german +60 tourists passed by and gived us a few coins for playing. (I never knew that german grandmas love punk songs like Dig up her bones so much).
Anyways, we also met some people from the same town in Slovakia we are from (top left picture) and recieved a deal to play at a bar terrace (bottom down picture).
We also went to Dornbirn, where we got a bit drunk and to Uberlingen, where we met Anna from the previous story.
We`ve been really glad for this offer, but the weather went wrong and so we had to play inside the pub. The only problem was, that there was a DJ, which was not really glad that we play during is time of fame, and also audience consisting of smth. like 6 people.
We finished this gig in less then hour, recieved 60 percent of promissed money and went all the way to Northeim, Germany, where my coleague Till from the skischool I was working in the winter.
We stayed in his father`s house, so we had some shower and proper food after some time. We also played in Gottingen, which is a city 30 km from Northeim, and we earned like 40 euro during one hour, plus a cool guy gave us a bag with bannanas, chockolates and bought us beer. He was also a musician, and turned out he liked our version of Born to be Wild.
Anyway, next best thing we did was we decided to ask in local Irish pub, if we can play there. Which we did…We just had to fill some papers for GEMA, which is some sort of terrorist organisation from what I`ve heard….
Playing here was probably greatest success on our way, people were singing with us, and Till`s girlfriend collected money to a flower-jar. We made 118 euro during one evening, which was also our top gain.
We liked the place, the owner played cajon with us, and so we decided to play one more evening. That evening was not as succesfull but still brought us some money ego reinforcement. Some local girls were hitting on us, and local boys didn`t exactly like it, exactly how a good concert should be finnished.
Next destnation, Frankfurt. I Knew a very friendly girl named Anne, living in this city, also from the time I was an Instructor. She gave us advice for some places to play, from which we played only in the subway, where we made some decent money. In this city we also gained a new member to the crew, Lenka, a female singer with a degree in music. (the only official musician in the team)
We also did some gig in another Irish bar, O`Reileys, this time for some free food and beer. Till this point everything is ok, only problems were, that it is almost impossible to find a parking place in the center, so we paid almost 40 euro altogether for parking during the day. Luckily Anne showed us some place to park for free, which became our base from that point. Anne also told us where we can go for some bridge jumping near the city, but weather was shit and therefore we left towards Netherlands.
First we arrived to Den Haag, where Jimmy, my friend also a ski instructor is living. He showed us some place where we can sleep. We had some good night weed from Den Haag and slept on an empty parking place, then the police kicked us out so we went to the beach to finish our sleep there.
After asking at the police, we recieved a response, that we can only play here with a permission, and that takes time aproximately to september. Fuck it, we decided to play without and act like we don`t know if they catch us.
Things didn`t go as well as we planned, people were giing us something, but not too much, and they were really foccused on their own things, which made us think, that we suck.
We also tried to play in a bar here, with possitive experiencce from before, also, the response of audience was quite cold. People were sobere and very critical. (I really like dutch people, but probably not as Audience)
Cool thing about Netherlands is, that you can see a man in his fourties getting drunk as fuck out of the pub, holding his guitar and cajon searching for a bicycle he drives home in a very funnyy way slightly after.
From here we went to Amsterdam which is the city that really defeated us. I recieved an advice we should have a sign “for weed” while we play, which will bring us more money.
It brought us more money, but it also brought us a lot of weed. By the end of the they we sometimes thought(we spent almost a week here), we thought that we can be dealers for a day. But just till we smoked that crap. Anyway, I personally love this city of freedom, and my mates probably share my feelings. 4 years ago I almost ended up in prison because of one trip here, but that by far didn`t damage my love for this place.
(I am actually not a weedhead, and besides a few accidental joints, I really have different hobbies. What I love about Amsterdam is the overall liberal atmosphere and the people which it brings to the city).
From other funfacts, our singer Lenka was hitted on by 2 drug dealers, which had really good game. The one who wanted to fuck her was whispering things to her ear, while his wingman was entertaining us.
Ok we also did one more Pub gig here, Irish pub again… This time we`ve been also drunk and stoned, so it did a bit damage to our performace. We`ve been really ashamed for what came out of our throats and fingers. I went away for a while, and during this period I lost Lenka and Laco somewherre. I went to search for them, they went to search for me.
We found each other in like 2 hours, which was enough time for my belowed friends to spend almost all money on beer and magical cakes. Well… As Charlie Sheen is Saying… Alcohol is poison, but sometimes we have things inside which need to be killed. Things like shame after a really bad perforance.
In amsterdam, we also played in many spots, best was probably Red Light DIstrict at night(From the financial point of view, and also from the weed per minute point of view)
One of the coolest moments was meeting this group of percusionists from California, (besides playing a rock ballad for an old hooker in the windowshop)
Most of the sleeping was done at a petrol station close to the Zeeberg P&R parking place. (photo on the right) This place was a free parking and a free sink for us. We also didn`t talk with the people at the petrol station just went inside a thousand times to fill bottles with water, clean teeth, shave, or connect to wifi. I am not sure what they thought about us, but it doesn`t matter now.
Another fun thing that was happening… We slept in the car, in sitting position, and sometimes I had dreams like the car is going down the hill and I have to pull the hand brake, which I pulled and everybody got scared. Sometimes I even reparked the car in half sleep, just because I had a dream we are on a highway and I fell asleep while driving.
We got to a point, where my mates took the keys from me, so I can do no harm while sleeping.
Somewherre in between we went to Rotterdam, where 2 Slovak girls, Baška and Soňa accomodated us in their dormitory. We had really nice times at their place, including showers, sleeping in horizontal position, and many more things…. (sadly no photo)
We also met some Jesus guys in the street, played another unsuccesfull daytime gig in a cafe by the river. And went back to Amsterdam.
This time we focused on making money for petrol, because time passed really quickly in this part of world, and as we fucked up many times, and had some obligations in Slovakia, we needed to slowly go back home.
We played in Amsterdam for like one or 2 more days and headed back home. While the plan was changed many times, we decided to go through Frankfurt again, because we knew good spot to make money, and also a free parking place, plus we didn`t do that bridge jump in a nearby place during our first visit. That place was called Mullheim and we camped there for like 2 days, slept outside, met some muslim non-terrorists (friendly guys with a water pipe) and gypsies from Serbia (aso friendly guys). (Actually there is one life lesson here. We forgot our cajon at a campfire place, and those gypsies came and told us, so dont judge too quickly kids).
During this 16 meter bridge jump in this place, I harmed both my rib and a Backbone, Laco also jumped, but harmed only his balls for a second.
Next stop was Nurenberg, city of Hitler`s final process. Here we spent one ore 2 days and night before we slept on some random lake nearby.
In Nurnberg, Lenka & Laco got a bit drunk, and it was a lot of fun going with them . Especially Laco got his night of fame. Besides throwing his mobile phone to the river, and planning to run away, he also told some random taxi driver, that he is Peter Sagan (famous Slovak cyclist)
The last interesting person, besides the black guys hitting on Lenka was Elliah, a crazy-skilled guitar, but mostly CHapman Stick player, who gave us some good advice about the city and playing in general.
From here, we managed to drive to our last playing stop- Karlovy Vary. A czech town famous for the international movie festival being here. Which was accidentally happening during our arrival, in it`s 50tieth anniversary, cool right?
We spent like 2 days here, met some cool guys from czech republic, which are also musicians and play in the street from time to time, so we jammed for some time. Also we made enough money to get home and stole the show on one party with 200 promotional baloons, which we brought to the main pub and people slowly started to try if there is hellium inside of them and if it can make them sound like some gay pop star, or not.
And this is the end my friends, we`ve been really tired, so we left before taking selfie with Richard Gere, and went back home. Our petrol budget was so tight, that the last payment on a petrol station was 1,7 euro, right after the Slovak border.
And now some fucking facts:
Distance driven: 4500 KM
Where did we sleep? Mostly in the car in sitting position, but sometimes outside or at our friends(=my friends), sometimes just on the grounnd.
How did we eat? Cheap food from supermarkets, usually really tight budget.
What about hygiene?
How did we make money?
How did we pay with them?
Why do we do this?
I can`t speak for my coleagues, but for me it is this craving for adventure, for doing something I love, something that actually makes me feel present, alive outside of this zombie state you find yourself in going to your dayjob, and finally the need to have audience, need to be heard.
In the end… If you want to read more stories, you can like my facebook page.
Or if you want to follow my stories in the future, you can now also follow my private profie here.
Team members: Laco, Lenka
Ok, I know this thing gets fucking long but here is last thing I have to share. This guy we found in Frankfurt smelled as fuck, so we wrote on a paper “Zum Duschen” which means “For shower” and let that sign make him some cash, genious, right?